Heartbreak
2023-03-25
My life is no longer full of you.All that remains are empty spaces.Holes from a family, life, and love that existed but you threw away. My heartbreak is endless, excruciating, and breathtaking.Continue Reading
Crying today
2019-08-11
I love your body. I love how you feel inside me. I love your lips! I love how our bodies make love, screw, fuck, have mind blowing sex… It is always so exciting, wonderful, explosive, emotional, and relieving!Continue Reading
Waking up next to you
2019-08-10
The day was emotional, long, full of heart filled conversation. Today was the closest I have ever felt to a happy and healthy family of my own and now I cannot sleep. It was a wonderful night and you are always amazing with my kids. Dinner at the table asContinue Reading
Another night alone…
2019-08-07
To start I bleached my kitchen completely. Then I bleached the dining room. Then I cleaned the floors by hand with bleach. Then got cleaned up and got in bed ALONE! Am I really so unwanted or unlovable? I refuse to drown my sad lonely feelings in random meaningless sexContinue Reading
Working every day to try and kill off the wife switch
2019-08-06
I have been a wife and mother most of my life. I have never had a time when I wasn’t raising kids or taking care of a full household like a wife. This is the first time I am really NOT a wife and it feels virtually impossible to turnContinue Reading
My self-destruct button
2019-08-05
Several years ago when I was feeling really bad about myself I met a guy who was really easy to have sex with and nothing else. No relationship, no chatting, nothing more than crazy rough semi-abusive sex and poof he would be gone. I wouldn’t need to do any ofContinue Reading
Prepared for the leave…
2019-06-29
I am already prepared for the moment you leave me…Already hardening my heart and foresee you leaving me in the future to go back to her. In that vision I have you leave me and return to her only to realize my love is, was, and would always leave youContinue Reading
Waiting
2019-06-18
I keep waiting for you to show up.Waiting for you to show your love for me.Hoping that how I show up for you will be how you show up for me.Promises that you will call and then no calls received.Promises that you will show up and spend time with meContinue Reading
Alone again
2019-06-17
What good is being in a relationship with someone when I end up alone every night? I feel like I am still seeing Joe! Always something better to do than to spend time with me. Always more important things going on. More priorities that are on the list while IContinue Reading
Bad day with Leo
2019-06-15
Today I left him alone knowing that he had 3 lacrosse games for Elyjah in Canandaigua and then when I heard from him it was very short sounding so I replied in kind. He was very upset and when I dropped by around 9:30pm to give him the Father’s DayContinue Reading
It Began:
2017-02-28
The search was on. I have searched for years to find what was missing. What it was I couldn’t figure out. I tried everything one person could ever imagine. I started to really believe that I would never find what was missing in my life. I had kids, married, loved,Continue Reading
Next Part from My Book
2017-01-13
I remember when she was about 4 months old and he picked her up and shook her at me telling me that if I didn’t do what he wanted he would hurt her and I almost died. I just continued to be the ever-changing wife to try and make himContinue Reading
Start of my book…
2017-01-12
As part of me starting to move on, become stronger, grow, and let things out to help me forgive I wanted to write my story. In the beginning, there was a man and a women who were together as just a fling. My father loved my mother but my motherContinue Reading