June 2019 - Everything and the Kitchen Sink...

Halo Top – Candy Bar ice cream

On: June 30, 2019

Many friends on Facebook have been talking about this ice cream so I thought I should try it and discuss my thoughts. I have tried many different types of ice cream, including regularly making ice cream at home. This was interesting. There are many flavors and the price point wasContinue Reading

Prepared for the leave…

On: June 29, 2019

In: Personal

Tagged: Chemistry, crushing my own heart, Dating Sucks, Distant love, Fear, getting out of the house, goals, hard to love, Hating the dating, having some fun, Heartbreak, how to destroy love for a person that hurts you, learning the ropes of dating in your 40s, Learning to love, life goals, Loss, love, love is difficult when you are planning for the leave, Lust, mixed signals, relationship goals, single mom dating, single mom trying to date, summer flings, The Leave, Tragedy of the heart, Trust

I am already prepared for the moment you leave me…Already hardening my heart and foresee you leaving me in the future to go back to her. In that vision I have you leave me and return to her only to realize my love is, was, and would always leave youContinue Reading

Cool Etsy Shop

On: June 28, 2019

In: Reviews

I wanted to share this shop because I have fallen in love with the earrings! SurrealSMBContinue Reading

3d Prints and Printing

On: June 27, 2019

In: 3d Printing, Tech Stuff

Several years ago I invested in my first 3d printer. I bought the xyz da vinci junior 1 and had an amazing time with it. It was small, contained, and worked well. It was a blast to create different small items and give them as gifts or using them myself.Continue Reading

Several weeks of a non working cell phone

On: June 24, 2019

In: Personal, Tech Stuff

After 2 weeks and 3 days of crazy tech support, lots of phone calls, and misery because switching to the new cell phone service provider (Spectrum) is finally over because I fixed everything. I went into the developer settings and changed them allowing me to change how the phone wouldContinue Reading

Waiting

On: June 18, 2019

In: Personal

Tagged: 40 something single mom and dating, Begin Again, being lied to, broken promises, can heartbreak cause actual heartbreak, constantly alone but dating, crushing my own heart, dating, dating a guy who just isnt into you, Dating in 2010s, Dating in your 40s, Dating Sucks, Distant love, Finding my filling, Games of the heart, hard to love, hating dating, Hating the dating, Heartbreak, hes just not that into you, I need attention, I need love, I need time, investing in love, Leo, Lies, Lonely nights, Longing for something, love, Love Games, love is difficult when you are planning for the leave, mixed signals, need kisses, needing to be kissed, Neglected, neglectful relationship, Neglectful Relationships, nevering showing up, no call, no time for me, Playing with my heart, promises, relationship, relationship goals, summer of Leo, Tragedy of the heart, Waiting, waiting for you, waiting for your love, waiting to be loved, you are nonexistent

I keep waiting for you to show up.Waiting for you to show your love for me.Hoping that how I show up for you will be how you show up for me.Promises that you will call and then no calls received.Promises that you will show up and spend time with meContinue Reading

J & C Debates

On: June 17, 2019

In: Personal

Today after over 4 hours of debating on the phone with Jenna we are discussing starting a YouTube channel for our debates. This is really exciting! I hope that we actually at least try it a few times. It could be fun, exciting, interesting… money making! Yeeeehaw!Continue Reading

Alone again

On: June 17, 2019

In: Personal

What good is being in a relationship with someone when I end up alone every night? I feel like I am still seeing Joe! Always something better to do than to spend time with me. Always more important things going on. More priorities that are on the list while IContinue Reading

Me in some of my drawings

On: June 17, 2019

In: Personal

My brains compartmentalization and how it is represented in drawing format. This is on a small scale. Some are completely empty waiting to be filled with situations I do not want to ever look at, think about, or see. Others are already filled and teetering on the top or bottomContinue Reading

Today was Father’s Day

On: June 16, 2019

In: Personal

It was a nice day. We went to Red Robin with Leo and his family. Jordan got injured when she slipped because the floors were extremely slippery and she bonked her chin on the table. Tonight Leo called to talk before he went to bed and after saying “There isContinue Reading

Bad day with Leo

On: June 15, 2019

In: Personal

Tagged: 40 something single mom and dating, Begin Again, being lied to, broken promises, can heartbreak cause actual heartbreak, constantly alone but dating, crushing my own heart, dating, dating a guy who just isnt into you, Dating in 2010s, Dating in your 40s, Dating Sucks, Distant love, Finding my filling, fucking, fucking a guy, Games of the heart, getting fucked, hard to love, hating dating, Hating the dating, Heartbreak, hes just not that into you, I need attention, I need love, I need time, investing in love, keeping my feelings on a leash, Leo, Lies, Lonely nights, Longing for something, love, Love Games, love is difficult when you are planning for the leave, mixed signals, need kisses, needing to be kissed, Neglected, neglectful relationship, Neglectful Relationships, nevering showing up, no call, no time for me, Playing with my heart, promises, relationship, relationship goals, relationships that will not progress, sex, sex without heart, sex without love, summer of Leo, Tragedy of the heart, trying to leash my feelings, Waiting, waiting for you, waiting for your love, waiting to be loved, Why dont you love me, wishing you would love me, you are nonexistent

Today I left him alone knowing that he had 3 lacrosse games for Elyjah in Canandaigua and then when I heard from him it was very short sounding so I replied in kind. He was very upset and when I dropped by around 9:30pm to give him the Father’s DayContinue Reading