Boundaries Archives - Everything and the Kitchen Sink...

Another night alone…

On: August 7, 2019

Tagged: 40 something single mom and dating, 40 something single mom and hating the dating, a little bit of everything about my life, Abuse, all the funny crazy things that happen when you are a single mom trying to date in your 40s, avoidance, Begin Again, being lied to, Boundaries, can heartbreak cause actual heartbreak, communication, crushing my own heart, dating, dating a guy who just isnt into you, Dating as a single mom, Dating in 2010s, Dating in your 40s, Dating Sucks, Distant love, exs, Finding love, Finding my filling, Games of the heart, great sex, hard to love, hating dating, Hating the dating, having some fun, health, Heart, Heartbreak, hes just not that into you, honesty, how to destroy love for a person that hurts you, lack of communication, Lasting Relationships, learning the ropes of dating in your 40s, Learning to love, Leo, Longing for something, Loss, love, Love Games, love is difficult when you are planning for the leave, Lust, mixed signals, need kisses, needing to be kissed, Neglected, neglectful relationship, Neglectful Relationships, Playing with my heart, Preparing to be hurt, Protecting my heart, redirection, relationship, relationship goals, relationships, Respect, RL, Self-Destruct, Self-Destruct Button, Self-Destruction, sex, sex with a guy who doesnt want you, sex with no orgasm, summer flings, summer of Leo, Talking less equals less relationship, Talking less equals no love, The Leave, Tragedy of the heart

To start I bleached my kitchen completely. Then I bleached the dining room. Then I cleaned the floors by hand with bleach. Then got cleaned up and got in bed ALONE! Am I really so unwanted or unlovable? I refuse to drown my sad lonely feelings in random meaningless sexContinue Reading

My self-destruct button

On: August 5, 2019

In: Personal

Tagged: 40 something single mom and dating, 40 something single mom and hating the dating, a little bit of everything about my life, Abuse, all the funny crazy things that happen when you are a single mom trying to date in your 40s, avoidance, Begin Again, being lied to, Boundaries, can heartbreak cause actual heartbreak, communication, crushing my own heart, dating, dating a guy who just isnt into you, Dating as a single mom, Dating in 2010s, Dating in your 40s, Dating Sucks, Distant love, exs, Finding love, Finding my filling, Games of the heart, great sex, hard to love, hating dating, Hating the dating, having some fun, health, Heart, Heartbreak, hes just not that into you, honesty, how to destroy love for a person that hurts you, lack of communication, Lasting Relationships, learning the ropes of dating in your 40s, Learning to love, Leo, Longing for something, Loss, love, Love Games, love is difficult when you are planning for the leave, Lust, mixed signals, need kisses, needing to be kissed, Neglected, neglectful relationship, Neglectful Relationships, Playing with my heart, Preparing to be hurt, Protecting my heart, redirection, relationship, relationship goals, relationships, Respect, RL, sex, sex with a guy who doesnt want you, sex with no orgasm, summer flings, summer of Leo, Talking less equals less relationship, Talking less equals no love, The Leave, Tragedy of the heart

Several years ago when I was feeling really bad about myself I met a guy who was really easy to have sex with and nothing else. No relationship, no chatting, nothing more than crazy rough semi-abusive sex and poof he would be gone. I wouldn’t need to do any ofContinue Reading

What to do when you are dating someone who doesn’t really parent…

On: August 3, 2019

In: Kids, Personal

Tagged: 40 something single mom and dating, 40 something single mom and hating the dating, avoidance, Boundaries, communication, dating, Dating as a single mom, Dating in 2010s, Dating in your 40s, Dating Sucks, family, Family fun, Fun, getting out of the house, hating dating, Hating the dating, Having a Family, having some fun, honesty, Lasting Relationships, learning the ropes of dating in your 40s, Leo, mom, mom mode, Neglected, Neglectful parenting, neglectful relationship, Neglectful Relationships, relationship, relationships, Respect, single mom, single mom dating, single mom trying to date, summer fun, summer of Leo, the mom mode

Last night we decided to take all of the kids to a drive-in movie at Vintage Drive-in. They were showing Lion King and Aladdin. The night was off to a bit of a rocky start as Leo’s son was not happy about eating the pulled chicken I made for everyoneContinue Reading

Digital based relationships

On: July 1, 2019

In: Personal

Tagged: Boundaries, dating, Dating as a single mom, Dating in 2010s, Dating Sucks, Digital, Digital Relationships, Digital Relationships vs Real Life Relationships, Neglected, Neglectful Relationships, RL

What is a digital based relationship and are they any good for our society? We can start by saying there is a HUGE difference between a fully digital based relationship and a semi-digital relationship. The one is completely in digital forums: text, phone, Facebook, Instagram, dating apps… etc. The otherContinue Reading

An old writing to Brett…

On: August 21, 2018

In: Personal

Tagged: Abuse, Abusers with no consequences, Andrew and Samanthas Dad, being lied to, Boundaries, Brett, child abuse, communication, Custody Battles, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Family Physical Abuse, Fear, Finding love, Heartbreak, Lasting Relationships, Lies, looks, love, Married Young and Abused, money, monroe county, Monroe County NYS, My Book, NYS, NYS Domestic Violence, Old, old writings, oldies, OP, Orders of Protection, Parental and Spousal Abuse, Protecting my heart, relationship, Respect, sex, Spousal Abuse

From around 2001-2002 Sometimes I am hurting because I still can’t understand why exactly you did all of the things that you have done. I know at this point I will never look at you as the man that I thought I once knew. After all of the stuff andContinue Reading

Ask Yourself These Questions!

On: July 30, 2018

In: Personal

Written around 1999-2001 Now, to start I would like to tell you all a little story that happened to me a long time ago! It all started one night while I was laying in bed with my husband after a long day of arguing. It all started when we gotContinue Reading

Abusers that get away without consequences

On: June 7, 2018

In: Personal

Tagged: Abuse, Abusers with no consequences, Andrew and Samanthas Dad, being lied to, Boundaries, Brett, child abuse, Custody Battles, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Family Physical Abuse, Heartbreak, Lies, Married Young and Abused, monroe county, Monroe County NYS, My Book, NYS, NYS Domestic Violence, OP, Orders of Protection, Parental and Spousal Abuse, Spousal Abuse

I live in Monroe County in NYS. Am I sure it actually matters where in this country you live? No, I am not. I have spent most of my life in NYS and all of that time I was with one abuser or another. What I can start with isContinue Reading

An Idea Of Love That Lasts…

On: March 12, 2018

In: Personal

Written around 1997-1999 Now, to start I want to tell you that the page this is linked to was the beginning of a great learning experience! I have read that page so many times with a great deal of tears until I talked to someone that really made me think.Continue Reading

It Began:

On: February 28, 2017

In: Personal

Tagged: Abuse, Abusers with no consequences, Andrew and Samanthas Dad, Begin Again, being lied to, Boundaries, Brett, child abuse, Childhood Abuse, Custody Battles, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Family Physical Abuse, Fear, Finding my filling, Heartbreak, idea of love, Lies, Longing for something, Loss, love, Married Young and Abused, My Book, NYS Domestic Violence, OP, Orders of Protection, Parental and Spousal Abuse, Protecting my heart, Spousal Abuse, The Leave, Tragedy of the heart

The search was on. I have searched for years to find what was missing. What it was I couldn’t figure out. I tried everything one person could ever imagine. I started to really believe that I would never find what was missing in my life. I had kids, married, loved,Continue Reading

Next Part from My Book

On: January 13, 2017

In: Personal

Tagged: Abuse, Abusers with no consequences, Andrew and Samanthas Dad, Begin Again, being lied to, Boundaries, Brett, child abuse, Childhood Abuse, Custody Battles, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Family Physical Abuse, Fear, Finding my filling, Heartbreak, idea of love, Lies, Longing for something, Loss, love, Married Young and Abused, monroe county, Monroe County NYS, My Book, NYS, NYS Domestic Violence, OP, Orders of Protection, Parental and Spousal Abuse, Protecting my heart, Spousal Abuse, The Leave, Tragedy of the heart

I remember when she was about 4 months old and he picked her up and shook her at me telling me that if I didn’t do what he wanted he would hurt her and I almost died. I just continued to be the ever-changing wife to try and make himContinue Reading

Start of my book…

On: January 12, 2017

In: Personal

Tagged: Abuse, Abusers with no consequences, Andrew and Samanthas Dad, Begin Again, being lied to, Boundaries, Brett, child abuse, Childhood Abuse, Custody Battles, Divorce, Domestic Violence, Family Physical Abuse, Fear, Finding love, Finding my filling, First Loves, Having a Family, Having Kids, Heart, Heartbreak, idea of love, Lies, Longing for something, Loss, Lost Virginity, love, Married Young and Abused, monroe county, Monroe County NYS, My Book, Neglected, Neglectful parenting, NYS, NYS Domestic Violence, OP, Orders of Protection, Parental and Spousal Abuse, Protecting my heart, sex, Spousal Abuse, The Leave, Tragedy of the heart

As part of me starting to move on, become stronger, grow, and let things out to help me forgive I wanted to write my story. In the beginning, there was a man and a women who were together as just a fling. My father loved my mother but my motherContinue Reading