WOW, this was a complete doozy. 4 years ago today my Ma passed away. She is not my biological mother but she is the closest thing I ever had to a mom. She was the only person who always loved me unconditionally. I digress, When I was 14 I met a guy named Steve. He was 16 at the time and it was love at first site for me! He was like 6ft 5 and had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen. I remember I was so immediately captured by him that I would never be the same and I never was. More about young Steve later…
So today I got on facebook and in the friend suggestion box Steve’s name was listed there and I said I know that mother fucker. I decided to send him a message because I really thought it was my ma telling me something. Maybe I needed to figure things from my past out, maybe I needed to have him in my life, maybe just maybe there was a universal reason to his name being on my screen that morning!
I sent him a silly private message about how his name had popped up and it was the 4 year anniversay of my ma’s passing. I explained that one of the last conversations her and I had was about him and a Thanksgiving we had many many years ago, almost 23 years ago to be more realistic. I had no real expectation that he would respond but when he did I remember loving his response and feeling a wave of emotions. We spent hours chatting on facebook messenger and it was a blast from the past I really needed. It reminded me of so many great things I did with him and the joy I felt at one point in my life. We had been homeless together, traveled together, he was my first of everything. My first kiss, sex, love, real relationship. He was “the guy” that nobody ever lived up to for years! We were silly, adventurous, and so in love. Once the chatting stopped I thought I wouldn’t hear from him again so when my facebook messanger did that facebook pop several hours later and it was from him I was giddy!
His message made me fall off the couch… “Is your oldest child my child?”