I finally understand although it hurts me so deeply. I will always be judge based on the other people who have hurt you. I will always be looked at with the eye of a cynic because you are incapable of seeing me and not every other person who hurt you.Continue Reading

I have traveled all over the country…  I have been in almost every state for at least a drive.  There are so many states I have loved for the way they look as well as based on the research I have done.  I have always wanted to move to Italy. Continue Reading

I know people who actually emotionally hurt me just by how they obsess over things on facebook.  I know that is a strange thing to say but how they react to things on facebook actually causes me distress! For example: I know this guy who is in his late 40’s,Continue Reading

As I sit here in my 40’s I am reflecting constantly about my past.  What are the major events that brought me to this life?  Was there one major moment that if I had chosen the left path my life would look absolutely opposite and would I want it toContinue Reading

I have spent 40 some odd years insisting I am moral and honest but in actuality I have been keeping so many secrets all my life… Let the purge begin… My 1st cousin tried to stick something in me sexually when we were 12. When I was 10 thru 12Continue Reading

I am officially moving this Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday!  Holy Hell!  I need more help.  I am so not prepared for what is about to happen in my life!  $550 more a month for rent plus I will have to pay for electric.  Then not only that but IContinue Reading

I am curious about all of these Go Fund Me accounts that people setup for other people that are struggling.  I am not traditionally a pity party type of girl but why has nobody ever done something like that for us?  After everything that has gone on in my lifeContinue Reading

Today I started packing up my life or what is left of the 41 years I have lived so far.  This is heart wrenching but the best thing for all of us! If I am being honest I am full of terror at all that can go wrong but alsoContinue Reading

Have you ever watched a rom-com and thought about how you wished your relationship/life mirrored that movie in any way?  I mean any pieces of that movie at all?  I never really had those moments of wishing my life was more like a movie romance but I have always hadContinue Reading

I started this year knowing I was emotionally ready to date and so I took the plunge.  I didn’t really do a lot of dating around before I met Leo.  Our first date was spectacular and we hit it off!  He was all in and so was I!  We wereContinue Reading

Drum roll please… The Mental Warfare Beast trophy goes to my father!  I have in past posts discussed so many different things about my childhood but I wouldn’t be doing history any justice if I didn’t touch on the fact that my father is a mental warfare beast!  He isContinue Reading

In March of 2017 I weighed in at 365 pounds with no clothes on. It was the heaviest I had ever been and have moved down since then slowly and steadily. In 2017 I had a full hysterectomy which changed how my body reacted to everything I put in myContinue Reading