I just happened upon that old movie: Hes just not that into you
WOW, I had totally forgotten how silly this movie is but how it makes me think all the time! I have actually used that statement on multiple occasions!
Here are the double standards:
- If she calls him a few times a day – she is obsessive, she is too clingy, she is too needy emotionally.
- If he calls to many times in a day – he is sweet, thoughtful, awe he likes to talk to me, he is missing you.
- If she wants to talk about the relationships – she is too needy, moving too fast, she is moving too fast, she is controlling.
- If he wants to talk about the relationship – he is sweet, he is thoughtful, he is a good guy, he is dedicated, he wants to build a life with you.
- If she is sad or hurt by his actions and cries – she is WAY to emotional, she is definitely in need of emotional help, she is one to watch out for because she doesn’t have her emotions under control.
- If he gets sad or hurt by her actions and cries – he is so awesome, he is in touch with his emotions and feelings, he is definitely a guy you would want to be with, he is a keeper, he is really the guy for her because healthy show of emotions is fantastic.
- If she goes all out in romantic gestures – she is too much, she is suffocating, she is taking away his masculinity.
- If he goes all out in romantic gestures – he is amazing, he is the dream guy, he is marriage material, he is the guy who will go the distance.
- If she sleeps with multiple different guys in a year – she is a slut, she is loose, she is a tramp, she is NOT the girl you marry.
- If he sleeps with multiple different girls in a year – he is figuring out what he wants, he is being a guy, he is sowing his oats.
How do you ever know if someone is just not into you? You don’t unless we are honest with one another!
Women perpetuate the struggles… if you have female friends then you understand this.
Oh he didn’t call?
Maybe he lost your number.
Maybe he lost his phone.
Maybe he had a family emergency.
Maybe something tragic happened.
He ghosted you?
Maybe he forgot.
Maybe he got busy.
Maybe he lost his phone.
Maybe your phone number got lost.
Maybe something awful happened to his family.
We always have something to say that helps justify why a guy disappears on us! We tell our sad, crying, hurting, lonely friends. NONE of that is true! If he disappears, if he doesn’t call, if he shows no interest, if he says he will show up and doesn’t, if he talks to you only once a week/month/year…
HE DOESN’T WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU!!!
He won’t wake up tomorrow and change his mind about you!
Most people know upon impact if you are a person they want to date more!
Most guys know if they want to spend more time learning about you!
Most guys know if they want to try with you!
We need to stop being scared of the double standard!
Call if you want to call! Be yourself! Stop hiding yourself under a bush and trying to be who society thinks you should be! There will be a person who sees you… REALLY SEES YOU! Sees you with all your goofy quirks, your silly all out moments, your cute faces, odd texts, strange voicemail’s! There is someone who will love all of those things about you!
Find that person for yourself!
Don’t settle your life into those stereotypes!
Go on with your bad self girls!